Jennifer approaches the soap box and climbs on top of it.
Latex is a cumulative allergy. The more exposure a person has to latex, the more likely they are to develop the allergy. I am not in a known group who is likely to develop a latex allergy. I am not a hairdresser who wears latex gloves to dye people's hair every day. I am not a health care worker who wears latex gloves to protect herself from patients. I am not a tattoo artist. I am not a fetishist with a requirement to wear latex gear.
Nonetheless, I have a latex allergy. Life has become a comical charade. Going to street festivals is now an athletic event where I doge balloons. Children's birthday parties are no better. We once went to a Passover Seder where each participant was given a goodie bag of plagues including a latex balloon. I don't remember which plague the balloon was supposed to represent. I was surrounded by metaphorical plagues, but the latex balloons being tossed back and forth between families was my real life plague.
Swim caps? Gotta keep me away from them. Bandaids? I generally carry my own, but if I'm offered one, I'll ask if they are latex free.
Because of my latex allergy, I also now have an allergy to avocado and bananas. Banana bread? I can't eat it. Burritos with avocado? No. I'm already quite a specific eater in many ways; I honor animals by choosing to be a vegetarian as I have been for the past 20+ years, so having additional food restrictions to things that I love has made eating even more challenging.
If I come in contact with latex, avocado or bananas, I currently break out in hives. But, because of its cumulative nature, my reaction gets worse each time. My next exposure could result in anaphylactic shock so I carry an EpiPen in my purse.
What was my exposure to latex? What led to me getting this allergy? I had a minor surgery in the 80s at the height of the AIDS scare when healthcare workers were apparently hyper-vigilant about protecting themselves. Therefore, there was a lot of latex in the operating and recovery room. I was in my teens. In the 90s, I had another surgery which added to the accumulation of latex in me. When I started having an active sex life, I heeded the warnings from health workers who advocated for safe sex. And, I had a bunch of safe sex using latex condoms starting in the 90s until I met my husband in 2004.
It's likely that our daughter is susceptible to the latex allergy since I am. How am I trying to protect her? I try to limit her latex exposure when possible. If a doctor or a dentist has a choice between latex and non-latex gloves, I'll request the non-latex gloves. Same with bandaids. We already don't have latex in the house because of my allergy, so she generally isn't playing with balloons or koosh balls while at home.
When she does come into contact with latex, which she undeniably does, I don't freak out (too much) because I know that she doesn't have much of a latex accumulation built up in her. In the case of a medical emergency, it'll be OK for her to be touched by latex gloves. At a friend's birthday party, she can play with latex balloons. If someone puts a latex bandaid on her, it's OK. On playdates at other people's houses, I try to be vigilant so that I'm not unnecessarily exposed, but I try to maintain some sense of normalcy so that I don't freak out my daughter or the family that we are playing with.
We're no where near the stage where she has to be thinking about how to have a safe and healthy sex life. When that time comes, I hope that there are condom options that are not latex, but that also don't involve animal skin!
I try to keep her exposure to latex down where possible, while letting some sort of reasonable amount of latex come into her life. And, I try to do this while somehow avoiding the latex myself.
Jennifer steps down from the soapbox.
Wednesday, May 22, 2013
Monday, May 20, 2013
3 Year Olds are Great at Improv
At one improv show I went to, possibly the only improv show I ever went to, the audience was invited to shout out locations ("a bathroom," "a movie theater") and then we were asked to shout out some sort of emotion (love-struck, nostalgic, elated); then the improv actors went with these suggestions and made up some sort of scene.
At one point at that improv show, one of the actors had some vision about the direction this scene should take, but then another actor cut in more forcefully with a vision of his own, so the first improv actor had to quickly change course and go along with his colleague's new vision.
In addition to having limited experience with acting and improv, I also have limited experience with 3 year olds. With my lack of experience not being a barrier to opinion, I think that 3 year olds are masterful improv actors.
At my daughter's preschool, they have a play area filled with various costumes including a tutu, a chicken costume and an asian inspired coat of some sort. Somehow, my daughter and her classmates thought that these were the perfect set of costumes to go together and they figured out some scenario where they played together and it all worked.
At home over the weekend, my daughter was pretending to be a mommy cat while I was supposed to be her baby cat. When I announced that it was time to wash our hands, she said how much she appreciated me and that I was being such a good baby cat by reminding us all to wash our hands.
At one point at that improv show, one of the actors had some vision about the direction this scene should take, but then another actor cut in more forcefully with a vision of his own, so the first improv actor had to quickly change course and go along with his colleague's new vision.
In addition to having limited experience with acting and improv, I also have limited experience with 3 year olds. With my lack of experience not being a barrier to opinion, I think that 3 year olds are masterful improv actors.
At my daughter's preschool, they have a play area filled with various costumes including a tutu, a chicken costume and an asian inspired coat of some sort. Somehow, my daughter and her classmates thought that these were the perfect set of costumes to go together and they figured out some scenario where they played together and it all worked.
At home over the weekend, my daughter was pretending to be a mommy cat while I was supposed to be her baby cat. When I announced that it was time to wash our hands, she said how much she appreciated me and that I was being such a good baby cat by reminding us all to wash our hands.
Tuesday, May 7, 2013
What I Want for Mother's Day
I'd like to have an errand free Mother's day. Not the kind of errand free day when I choose to not do errands, but I know that I will get to them the next day; I'd like the kind of errand free day when the errands that I would have done somehow get done by someone else. My husband? A task rabbit? Someone hired from Craigslist? This would be a good way for me to feel like all the work I do to keep our house and our family running are valued.
I'd love Scott to tell me that I'm a good mom. Words are generally my #1 gift of choice.
Ditto for Star. I can already imagine her throwing her little arms around me and hearing her tell me that she loves me. Whenever she hugs me, I try to breathe in her scent and feel her warmth. Sometimes I do that and she says, "don't smell me, mommy." But, I love smelling my little girl. I just try to hide it from her so I don't get reprimanded. I know that affection is precious.
And, I'd like Star to make me some art on a canvas in a frame - ready to be hung. Here's some recent art from Star which I love, but now I have to frame it or decide that it shouldn't be framed and store it away somewhere. I've had it in my office for a few days on my filing cabinet; art waiting for a frame to be hung feels like another errand waiting to get done by mommy.
I'd love Scott to tell me that I'm a good mom. Words are generally my #1 gift of choice.
Ditto for Star. I can already imagine her throwing her little arms around me and hearing her tell me that she loves me. Whenever she hugs me, I try to breathe in her scent and feel her warmth. Sometimes I do that and she says, "don't smell me, mommy." But, I love smelling my little girl. I just try to hide it from her so I don't get reprimanded. I know that affection is precious.
And, I'd like Star to make me some art on a canvas in a frame - ready to be hung. Here's some recent art from Star which I love, but now I have to frame it or decide that it shouldn't be framed and store it away somewhere. I've had it in my office for a few days on my filing cabinet; art waiting for a frame to be hung feels like another errand waiting to get done by mommy.
Wednesday, May 1, 2013
(Birthday) Love in the Time of Facebook
Yesterday was my birthday. I'm not sure how I got to be 42, but so far, it's looking pretty good!
I had a wonderful day. One of Star's babysitters arrived at 7:30am to finish getting Star ready for school and to take her there. Scott and I escaped and went out to breakfast (which we almost never do), went hiking in Marin, went to some used clothing stores, I got a pedicure, Scott and I hung out together in the house, and then I went to dinner with a group of girlfriends. When I got home, Star was still awake, so I snuggled with her and we talked about our days.
Running parallel to my actual birthday, was how my birthday was celebrated in my virtual life.
Facebook was the most active of my online identities. Here's a breakdown of who I heard from through Facebook.
One friend sent me a message through Words With Friends which was unique and cute.
And, I got only one card through the mail. It was from my in-laws and felt quaint in the best possible way.
I had a wonderful day. One of Star's babysitters arrived at 7:30am to finish getting Star ready for school and to take her there. Scott and I escaped and went out to breakfast (which we almost never do), went hiking in Marin, went to some used clothing stores, I got a pedicure, Scott and I hung out together in the house, and then I went to dinner with a group of girlfriends. When I got home, Star was still awake, so I snuggled with her and we talked about our days.
Running parallel to my actual birthday, was how my birthday was celebrated in my virtual life.
Facebook was the most active of my online identities. Here's a breakdown of who I heard from through Facebook.
- Actual friends. These are people who are likely to show up in my facebook stream often and I choose to have an in person relationship with them.
- Family members. By choice or not, these are people that I'm related to and their birthday greetings are wonderful.
- People I knew in High School, College, or Law School. Oh, it's so awkward. Many of these people know such an outdated version of me. They knew me when I chose to be called "Jenny." They remember me when I was a French Horn playing band geek. Some of them knew me when I was an out of place Californian living in Oregon. There are definitely people from my past who have transitioned to "current" friends, but for the most part, these are a group of people that I don't have an actual real-time relationship with. It's sweet that they mention my birthday on facebook, because facebook tells them it's my birthday, but it feels so inauthentic. Also, it puts my head in a weird place on my birthday. While having a nice day off from work doing what I wanted to do, I was continuously thrown into the past thinking about these people. What do they think about me? Should I be embarrassed about something that I did in front of them in my past? Should I try to forge a real relationship with some of these people? Or, should I un-friend them and have less head clutter in my life?
One friend sent me a message through Words With Friends which was unique and cute.
And, I got only one card through the mail. It was from my in-laws and felt quaint in the best possible way.
Wednesday, April 17, 2013
Vegetarian Cookbook Collection
I became a vegetarian in 1990 as a Sophomore at U.C Berkeley. I was away from my conformist hometown and able to make decisions for myself for possibly the first time in my life. I quite easily decided that I no longer wanted to kill animals to fuel my body. It was as simple as that. It was an easy decision and I am committed to my vegetarianism from all parts of my being.
For the past 20+ years, I've been collecting vegetarian cookbooks. It started out of necessity. I became a vegetarian without really understanding what I would eat. How would I nourish myself? What would I bring for potlucks? My image of a plate of food revolved primarily around an animal protein with some vegetables on the side. The internet didn't yet exist as prevalently as it does now, so I couldn't google search "vegetarian recipes" and "pin" them, so I began buying cookbooks.
My last week of Law School, in Oregon, a vegetarian girlfriend and I went to Breitenbush Hot Springs. Breitenbush is a wonderful place with meditation spaces, yoga, hot springs, hiking in the mountains, a beautiful river, and all vegetarian food. The food was delicious. I remember eating a loaf with gravy; I had never tasted something so delicious. For breakfasts, there was granola, soymilk, tofu scrambles, and whole wheat waffles. My mind expanded. I bought the hot springs' cookbook before we left. When I was in library school, I lent my Breitenbush cookbook to one of my classmates who claims that she lost it. I plan to replace it, but I haven't gotten around to it yet.
Now, I have approximately 50 vegetarian cookbooks. I also have a binder
that I've created of favorite recipes and recipes that have been passed
down in my family, and recipes that I use for Jewish holidays.
If Scott and I are in someone else's house, and they have built in shelves in the kitchen, Scott often comments on how I would love that feature for my cookbook collection. Until I get my dream kitchen, my cookbooks sit on these Ikea shelves which I bought and asked my neighbor to install.
Ironically, perhaps, I don't cook much. Back in my single days, my singular specialty was couscous with vegetables. That's the only thing I remember cooking for daily nourishment. On all the first dates I went on in my 30s, I would go to various restaurants and order some vegetarian option which was generally high carb and low protein (think spaghetti.)
One boyfriend back then was a passionate meat eater. We had horrible fights after we returned home from an event where food was shared by everyone, and there was nothing for me to eat. Despite my protests, I hosted a sushi making party for his birthday complete with many kinds of fish. He was not at all respectful of my compassionate eating choices. He was also the boyfriend who laughed at the fact that I was becoming a librarian - he didn't see it as a good career choice. I wish I had seen that he was not the right one for me and broken up with him before he broke my heart.
When I dated my husband, it was the first time I had dated a vegetarian. With him, I got to explore the world of vegetarian restaurants. We could order anything off the menu. It felt like I was back at Breitenbush with a bounty of vegetarian options without the need to feel apologetic.
I married that vegetarian boyfriend. I still don't cook much, but I love my cookbook collection. For special events, I pull down some of my cookbooks. Recently, for Passover, I took a day and a half off from work to cook. Here are 2 of the dishes I created - a yellow squash gratin, and a quinoa pancake thing. When I focus my mind and cook, it all turns out pretty good, I think!
For the past 20+ years, I've been collecting vegetarian cookbooks. It started out of necessity. I became a vegetarian without really understanding what I would eat. How would I nourish myself? What would I bring for potlucks? My image of a plate of food revolved primarily around an animal protein with some vegetables on the side. The internet didn't yet exist as prevalently as it does now, so I couldn't google search "vegetarian recipes" and "pin" them, so I began buying cookbooks.
My last week of Law School, in Oregon, a vegetarian girlfriend and I went to Breitenbush Hot Springs. Breitenbush is a wonderful place with meditation spaces, yoga, hot springs, hiking in the mountains, a beautiful river, and all vegetarian food. The food was delicious. I remember eating a loaf with gravy; I had never tasted something so delicious. For breakfasts, there was granola, soymilk, tofu scrambles, and whole wheat waffles. My mind expanded. I bought the hot springs' cookbook before we left. When I was in library school, I lent my Breitenbush cookbook to one of my classmates who claims that she lost it. I plan to replace it, but I haven't gotten around to it yet.
Now, I have approximately 50 vegetarian cookbooks. I also have a binder
that I've created of favorite recipes and recipes that have been passed
down in my family, and recipes that I use for Jewish holidays. If Scott and I are in someone else's house, and they have built in shelves in the kitchen, Scott often comments on how I would love that feature for my cookbook collection. Until I get my dream kitchen, my cookbooks sit on these Ikea shelves which I bought and asked my neighbor to install.
Ironically, perhaps, I don't cook much. Back in my single days, my singular specialty was couscous with vegetables. That's the only thing I remember cooking for daily nourishment. On all the first dates I went on in my 30s, I would go to various restaurants and order some vegetarian option which was generally high carb and low protein (think spaghetti.)
One boyfriend back then was a passionate meat eater. We had horrible fights after we returned home from an event where food was shared by everyone, and there was nothing for me to eat. Despite my protests, I hosted a sushi making party for his birthday complete with many kinds of fish. He was not at all respectful of my compassionate eating choices. He was also the boyfriend who laughed at the fact that I was becoming a librarian - he didn't see it as a good career choice. I wish I had seen that he was not the right one for me and broken up with him before he broke my heart.
When I dated my husband, it was the first time I had dated a vegetarian. With him, I got to explore the world of vegetarian restaurants. We could order anything off the menu. It felt like I was back at Breitenbush with a bounty of vegetarian options without the need to feel apologetic.
Tuesday, April 9, 2013
Me on Reality TV
I love reality TV. I often wonder what I would be like as a reality TV star. Would I be a controlling bitch who the rest of the cast and all of America grows to hate? Or, would I become America's sweetheart because I'm a good listener and don't get involved in various dramas.
And, what my life would be like after my stint on TV. Would I have celebrity friends in high places? Would my family be featured in People magazine?
Which TV show would I be on? Let's look at some possible scenarios.
The Biggest Loser. This is one of my favorite shows. First step for me to become a contestant is to gain 100 or more pounds. Then, get cast on the show. Once those awful and possibly impossible steps are accomplished, I get access to amazing trainers and a beautiful kitchen. I get to spend time at a beautiful "ranch" in Southern California and make friends with Bob, Jillian and Dolvett. I can envision myself hugging Bob at the finale and having him say that he's proud of me. Would I be perceived as an uptight lawyer-type like Gina from the most recent season? Or, could I somehow channel sweet sweet Lisa and only show that side of myself? My imagined life after Biggest Loser would be wonderful. I would be able to quit working for other people and not have to deal with petty office bullshit. I'd have a platform and could then become a motivational speaker; I'd spend my time traveling, working out, eating healthy and telling others that they can have a healthy body weight too.
Survivor. I need perfect conditions to sleep. I like sleeping on my tummy with a just right pillow under my head. I don't like being surrounded by bugs; I like being clean; I don't love camping; I don't like being thirsty or hungry; and, I'm a vegetarian. For all those reasons, I really can't see myself ever being a castaway on Survivor. Sign me up to be a lifetime viewer of this show.
Shark Tank. This is the show which is probably the most natural fit for me. Entrepreneurs go on this show to pitch their ideas in the hope of getting money and partners. I'm a born entrepreneur from an entrepreneurial family. (As a side note, I married a born entrepreneur also from an entrepreneurial family. It'll be interesting to see how our daughter turns out.) I'm not sure which business venture I'd pitch to them. But, I'd love the opportunity to turn down an offer from Mr. Wonderful and form a partnership with Robert Herjavec- love him.
Project Runway. Fashionistas sew clothes and get judged. The designers have either been sewing for clients for a long time, or are newly minted fashion school graduates. They are professional clothing makers. They are judged and mentored by famous people in the fashion world - Heidi Klum, Tim Gunn, Michael Kors, and others including guest judges. I love this show. But, it sometimes seems a bit odd to me. Creations that I love are often criticized by the judges, and designs that I think are horrid are praised. I guess fashion is in the eye of the beholder.
A Hybrid Between Master Chef + Project Runway. This is a show of my own creation. Let's break down the elements. Master Chef involves regular people (not trained chefs) who love cooking, and have some cooking skills. Master Chef contestants work in an amazing kitchen with fabulous kitchen tools and wonderful ingredients. Project Runway pits trained clothing designers against one another. My hybrid TV show idea is to take people who have no formal sewing training, but who have some knack for it, and put them head to head with other kitchen table sewists. The sewists would get access to amazing sewing machines, sergers, ruffle feet, and fabric. Maybe they would take trips to Mood?
Possible challenges could include:
And, what my life would be like after my stint on TV. Would I have celebrity friends in high places? Would my family be featured in People magazine?
Which TV show would I be on? Let's look at some possible scenarios.
Survivor. I need perfect conditions to sleep. I like sleeping on my tummy with a just right pillow under my head. I don't like being surrounded by bugs; I like being clean; I don't love camping; I don't like being thirsty or hungry; and, I'm a vegetarian. For all those reasons, I really can't see myself ever being a castaway on Survivor. Sign me up to be a lifetime viewer of this show.
Shark Tank. This is the show which is probably the most natural fit for me. Entrepreneurs go on this show to pitch their ideas in the hope of getting money and partners. I'm a born entrepreneur from an entrepreneurial family. (As a side note, I married a born entrepreneur also from an entrepreneurial family. It'll be interesting to see how our daughter turns out.) I'm not sure which business venture I'd pitch to them. But, I'd love the opportunity to turn down an offer from Mr. Wonderful and form a partnership with Robert Herjavec- love him.
Project Runway. Fashionistas sew clothes and get judged. The designers have either been sewing for clients for a long time, or are newly minted fashion school graduates. They are professional clothing makers. They are judged and mentored by famous people in the fashion world - Heidi Klum, Tim Gunn, Michael Kors, and others including guest judges. I love this show. But, it sometimes seems a bit odd to me. Creations that I love are often criticized by the judges, and designs that I think are horrid are praised. I guess fashion is in the eye of the beholder.
A Hybrid Between Master Chef + Project Runway. This is a show of my own creation. Let's break down the elements. Master Chef involves regular people (not trained chefs) who love cooking, and have some cooking skills. Master Chef contestants work in an amazing kitchen with fabulous kitchen tools and wonderful ingredients. Project Runway pits trained clothing designers against one another. My hybrid TV show idea is to take people who have no formal sewing training, but who have some knack for it, and put them head to head with other kitchen table sewists. The sewists would get access to amazing sewing machines, sergers, ruffle feet, and fabric. Maybe they would take trips to Mood?
Possible challenges could include:
- Make an outfit for your daughter's (or son's) 3rd birthday party which is happening tomorrow.
- Make your husband/brother/partner a set of work appropriate button down shirts that fit him.
- Make yourself a fabulous gown for some upcoming event.
- Create a quilt for a new baby. There can be a twist midway through this challenge to turn the quilt into a sundress.
Monday, April 1, 2013
Monster Family
I work at a Law School. I am a Law Librarian and an Adjunct Professor there. Each year, the students hold a Public Interest auction in order to raise money so that students can work in the public interest and be somewhat compensated.Last year, when the committee in charge of this auction asked me to contribute, I was supportive, but not sure what I would do. I ended up crocheting this monster. I didn't attend the auction, but I think it went for $20 to a student who wanted to give it to his 2 year old nephew.
We did the same thing back when I was in Law School. I remember one year I made a knitted felt hat to be auctioned off. For some reason, there was a bidding war for my hat. One of my classmates had a bit of a crush on me and bid way too much for it. I think he thought that some personal services came with his buying of the hat. Ah, my awkward law school days.
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